Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
