Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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