I bet he comes in French.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
