i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
