We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
