i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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