i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
