This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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