just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
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