Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
