S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
