I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize
