is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
