I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Randomize
