she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Randomize
