is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I have grass duct taped all over my body
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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