C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
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Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
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I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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