Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
