It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
