Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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