Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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