We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
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