i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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