..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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