Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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