Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Randomize
