my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize