Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
