everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize