You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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