I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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