We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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