Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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