: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
