So drunk, too bad you don't want this
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
