Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I just gift wrapped bread.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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