i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I'm at about main and main street
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
