Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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