are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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