You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
