I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Randomize