White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
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get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
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tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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