Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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