I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
