Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
