So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Duck Duck Cougar?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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