we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
