I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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