Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
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