marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize